Alright, got it in game no crashing, got the head placcement correct. This pics a bit outdated due to size/position but I thought it was funny.
Still don't quite understand what Runic is doing here. I haven't found anything on attachment angles for helmets.
The destroyer mesh files have complete sets of armor rigged, and that's what I did initially with this helmet. + the drop model. Not being able to align the helmet made me think it might just be an attached drop model like a sword.
So I changed the position of the drop model and sure enough, it changed the position of the on head model. So I guess rigging the helmet to the head is unessecary.I suppose shoulder armor is the same way (probably one model that gets mirrored, just need to figure out which side to export as drop model).
One problem though, now the drop model rests on the back of the helmet, not the bottom like above. I decide to just reuse (convert to xml, edit names, convert back to mesh) the dragon armor. Seems to work fine that way. Didn't have any luck seeing the helmet model though if I tried to export through Max 7 and the Ofusion exporter like I have done with weapons. If I can get it to work with Ogre exporters than helmets, shoulders, and weapons could be exported from any program and there'd be less need for Max 9.